Have you heard this compliment before: "oh my gosh, you look SO thin!!"
Maybe someone said it to you, maybe you've seen it as a comment on social media, or maybe you over heard this line at a get together. Women crave this compliment. I think a lot of times women will throw compliments out there just to be nice. Compliments about shoes or purses, a cute dress. Those kind of compliments can be exaggerated. The "you look so thin" line is not one you can use unless you 100% mean it. Whether or not a bag is cute is based on preference, personal style, and taste. What you weigh on a particular day is a fact. A nonnegotiable number.
We all have a slightly different definition for the word "thin." Is it a certain weight? A certain size? A goal? Chains that keep you from enjoying your life? So many women struggle with weight. It's insane. Women of all sizes, that's what makes it so crazy. Two women, the same age, one weighs twice as much as the other yet both hate the way they look. Why is it such a problem with women? I wish I could tell you. I wish I could fix it. The only thing I can do is share with you that it's something I've struggled with since I was 18. Striving to be the perfect size and a certain weight. It's exhausting and impacts so many areas of life. Have you ever missed out on something because you didn't feel pretty enough to go? You didn't attend an event or accept an invitation because you had nothing to wear, or maybe what you wanted to wear didn't fit at that time. I have. Multiple times. I'll own it.
I don't think it's reasonable to ask you to feel like a beauty queen 365 days a year. Emotions, deadlines, they all have to be dealt with. I challenge you (and I challenge myself) to find and focus on goals more meaningful than being thin. If you don't like how you look and it's causing you to feel bad, focus on exercise. Learn something new or take a new class. Focus on learning how to cook new recipes that are somewhat healthier. You can take good care of yourself without obsessing about your size. You can work hard towards weight loss, you can work hard toward being the strongest version of yourself without putting yourself down every day.
YOU'RE FREAKING GORGEOUS! You wake up every day and do all the things. Take care of this person, go here, go there, check in on that friend, call that family member you miss, handle this, make that deadline, impress your boss, provide, comfort, problem solve. It's hard. It's so hard, but you're doing it seven days a week. Give yourself some credit, come on! You're doing a great job. In the midst of all of that, don't forget to take care of yourself, but please at least try to do it in a healthy way. You're capable no matter your size. You're worthy no matter your weight. You are a warrior. A warrior wouldn’t compliment another person for looking thin, because there are other qualities that are actually meaningful in life. Qualities and achievements that deserve a compliment. A warrior wouldn’t jump for joy if called thin because there are other characteristics (honesty, intelligence, bravery) that are actually worth striving toward. Those are the things one should want to be recognized for.
On Saturday evening after the third round was complete they interviewed Tiger Woods. He was told his tee time would be 9:20AM on Sunday morning. Due to weather, Sunday start times for the fourth and final round of the Masters had to be moved to the morning. They then asked Woods what his morning routine looks like when he has a start time of 9:20. What he said was incredible. It not only got my attention but had me wondering if I misheard him. I'm paraphrasing here, so I do apologize if it's not word for word. Here's what he said:
"I'll wake up around 4:00, maybe 3:45 to get my body ready for the day and go from there."
Commitment. Excellence. Hall of Fame worthy. Nothing worth fighting for is handed out. You must work for what you want in life. When Woods gave his answer yesterday it was a good reminder of that. Be the best. Do your best. Quit complaining. Do the impossible. Be great.
Our second MeetUp was just a few days ago. One of my friends joined us and two other ladies. I’m praying that our group continues to grow and that these events help as many woman as possible. Giving them a place to go on the weekend, time to be heard, and the chance to be included. This Saturday’s event will be in a different part of town. I don’t think it’s fair to have every single event in the same area/same side of town. I’m hoping the shorter drive for some will make it easier to make it to more events.
The sermon I listened to this morning was on the following topic: insecurity. Something everyone deals with at one point in time. I hope it's not a daily battle for you and that you know God made you, he loves you, he has a plan and a purpose for you.
Here are my notes from this morning:
1. Fight insecurity with your God given identity.
When you have doubts and you don't feel capable remember that you are loved, you have been forgiven. The King of all Kings knows your name. Forget the labels you've given yourself (too short, too tall, too heavy, too frail, not smart enough). Forget the labels of society (lawyer, doctor, CEO, rich, poor).
2. The confidence that comes from temporary things is just that, temporary.
A lot of people feel worthy or less than worthy based on their looks. Are you pretty? Do you turn heads when you walk in a room? Those looks will fade, no matter who you are. One day when you don't look as good as the 22 year old at the next table, how will you feel? Will you be able to hold your head high knowing you have so much more to offer the world than the way you used to look? Your house, your car, your boyfriend, or that nice office with the killer view you get to work from each day...it could all be gone in a minute. If your sense of worth comes from anything temporary, you will only feel secure when those things are in your life. That's dangerous.
3. Confidence in God comes through obedience.
If you're familiar with the Bible, or grew up going to church you know what needs to be done. You know how you should carry yourself. You know what to avoid and you know that doing things your own way is reckless. Do you walk the walk or are you only a Christian in theory. If everyone knew the type of people you spend time with, if everyone knew where you spend your Saturday nights what would they think? Would they view you in a different light? Your actions and the way you live your life should be in line with your beliefs, and the things you stand for. In the sermon that speaker kept using the term "up to bat." A lot of us know what we should do, but it's difficult to actually do things the right way day in and day out. Many of us get up to bat, see the odds and then toss the bat down. We don't even try. It's too hard. Living a Christian life is hard. Having faith is difficult at times. Especially when you've been waiting for years or feel lost. Be obedient. The Lord loves you. You are a child of God.
I hope you're able to take on the week with the type of confidence that can only be rooted in the Lord. I hope that people see the way you're living your life. I hope people take note of the way you treat other people around you. I hope they want what you have. Confidence in yourself, confidence in the Creator, and confidence in his plan. Y'all have a good week!
I must have had a dream about Instagram because I woke up determined to get ready faster than usual so I would have time to go live on Instagram. The original plan didn’t work because there was this guy with a leaf blower right outside my coffee shop. Once I finally recorded the whole thing, I realized the mic was covered for 20% of the time. Lord help me. You live and ya learn. I’m going to try again at lunch today. Goals: Don’t cover the mic, and try to find lighting as good as this morning.
I won’t have any coffee by lunch time so my whole vision is out the window for Day 1. I’ll make it work. Don’t worry. See y’all between 11 & 12!
A recent sermon here in Dallas suggested that our hearts are like a broken GPS, and following your heart every time is not the right thing to do.
Have you ever used your phone to navigate to a new destination? Odds are you’ve been in a situation where the GPS is telling you to take a certain exit but that exit no longer exists. Or maybe the GPS says you’ve arrived but you know this is not the right place. It’s incredibly frustrating. You relied on the phone’s GPS, those instructions, and now you’re lost. I’ve done the same with my heart. I listened to and then followed my heart only to end up running around in circles for far too long trying to find my way back to the main road.
You must follow the desires of God’s heart, not your own. You must live by his teachings. Follow his advice.
The sermon reminded me that no matter what your situation is, no matter what you’re stuck in, there is a way out. There’s a path towards freedom and that is Jesus. Then when you get stuck again, he’ll be there to help you out.
I've been up since 6am. I woke up early to get ready for the first SometimeSaturday event here in Dallas. In case you missed the back story behind these events, you can watch a short video here. The video explains everything. The purpose of these events will be crystal clear after you watch the video.
The first event just ended and now I'm back at home. I want to share a few things with you. I've been praying about this for a while. Hoping God would guide me through this journey and along the path while I'm trying to accomplish these huge goals of mine. I said a quick prayer in my car before I headed inside.
I got there early and will do so every time so no one has to sit alone. I brought a book just in case no one showed. One of the books I'm reading right now is Grit by Angela Duckworth. I purposefully wanted to read this while I waited as a reminder to be both patient and resilient. Rome wasn't built in a day. Big things take time and commitment. I wanted to remember that no matter what happens at any particular event I must keep pursuing the overall goal. Of course I wanted with all of my heart and soul for people to show up and I would be lying if I said otherwise. I told myself all along that as long as one person shows up, I will be happy. One. That's all.
One person did show up and I am over the moon about it. That might not sound like a big deal or some grand accomplishment but I've got to start somewhere. Little by little. This can be done, and I will make it happen. I'll continue to put myself out there time and time again. I don't mind. I'm not afraid.
I must also mention that two of my friends in Dallas (the two that I refer to in the video) both showed up this morning. Early. On a Saturday. On their day off work. Two amazing women who I will forever be thankful for. I almost started crying this morning when I was waiting alone thinking how lucky I am to have friends who are genuine. I don't have a million friends and never have, but the ones I do have are the best. I knew that even if no one else attended the event today, I would at least get to see two of my friends. Both told me that they would be there, and they were. They showed up and it was the coolest thing ever. Thanks you two : )
The next event is Saturday April 6th. You can find all the details for the events here.
Just in case you’re not feeling like yourself today, or maybe you don’t feel as confident and capable as you should...
Girl by Maren Morris
At the very least play air guitar at the beginning of the song to feel like an instant bad ass.
The older I get, the more I miss school. I miss learning. I've taken it upon myself to get creative and find new ways to learn. Stay tuned y'all : )
The latest adventure was a course at SMU put on by Kappa.
What do you do to learn new things? Do you read, attend workshops or conferences? Take courses online? I challenge you to continue to learn, for your entire life. Don't ever settle. Continue to challenge yourself. Always and forever.
Here are the most asked questions, and the answers that go along with them:
1. Are the events for both guys and girls?
No, these events are organized for women only.
2. Are the events for 20/30 year olds?
Yes, but they're also for 40/50/60 year olds. You don't have to be the same age as me to attend.
3. Will the events all be held in Dallas?
As of now, yes. I'm choosing locations located in central Dallas.